“People call me a perfectionist, but I'm not. I'm a rightist. I do something until it's right, and then I move on to the next thing.”―James Cameron
Area of Avoidance: Feeling guilty about being bad or not good enough because of criticism.
Core Positive Attribute:Quality
Often Attracted to…
Reliability; high standards; attention to detail.
Honesty, Integrity and goodness.
Fairness and justice.
Complying with rules, regulations and procedures.
Operating within accepted social norms.
High ethics; moral standards; self-discipline.
Strong self-control.
Often Avoids…
Being bad, corrupt or defective.
Feelings of anger and resentment.
Displaying aggression.
Loss of self-control.
Errors or breaking the rules.
Contravening accepted norms.
Doing anything less than perfectly.
High Integration – characteristic behaviours
Strong moral and ethical values.
High integrity.
Striving to improve things.
A focus on quality.
A realisation that there is often more than one ‘right way’.
Flexibility and creativity in the achievement of desired outcomes.
A realisation that some rules are important, and some need to be challenged, changed, or even abandoned.
Focusing more on principles and values rather than entirely on ‘rules’.
Low Integration – characteristic behaviours
Very critical of self.
Very strict with self and with others.
Frequent guilty feelings for not being perfect or not doing better.
Frequently pointing out others’ mistakes or what they should have done differently. This comes across as picky and critical.
Inflexibility in thinking and ways of doing things. “There’s only one right way!”
Serious, heavy demeanour.
Extremely high, and often impossible to reach, standards and expectations.
Typical development needs
Learning to focus on principles and values rather than simply rules.
Learning to focus on the positive and what’s working well, not just the negative and what’s not working well.
Learning to be gentle with self and others.
By Colin Adam
